Once Upon a Time in Kyiv

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Once upon a time, there was a giant hero, Ironfist the Eternal, the son of a radioactive general. A fighter by nature, he became a world champion and reigned in three different decades. He was never defeated in any fight, except those that took place on a chess board, and was known by the name Dr. Ironfist because he was also a scholar.  He was granted the name “The Eternal” by the clan, which is the honor they give to their undefeated.

His brother was a professor and gold-medalist boxer, known as Dr. Steelhammer. He set the record for holding the world championship in boxing for the longest time ever.

The brothers were champions. But they never fought each other because they promised their mother they wouldn’t.

Steelhammer crossed the ocean, met a movie star, and they fell in love. The star became famous as a superhero who could not be hurt, and later as a country diva. She loved animals, especially the animals of the ocean, and she traveled the world and made movies to defend them.

The brothers led their people to fight corruption, value justice, and prosper. In doing so, the brothers earned the hatred of a cruel and aggressive dictator from a powerful neighboring land with a gigantic army. The same neighbor whose leaders their father once served in war and peace. And then… against the wishes of the entire world… the dictator laid siege to the brothers’ capital city and the brothers sprang to its defense.

Sound like a fairytale?

Ironfist is Vitali Klitschko, boxing name “Dr. Ironfist”; named The Eternal by the WBC in 2016, an honorific they give to undefeated champions who’ve staged multiple title defenses. Dr. Steelhammer is his brother Wladimir. Their father was a major general in the Soviet Air Force and one of the Chernobyl cleanup leaders. The starlet is Hayden Panettiere of Heroes and Nashville fame.

And did I mention that Vitali is the mayor of Kyiv? Outnumbered, outgunned, he and Wladimir are on the front lines of the war to defend Ukraine. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vitali_Klitschko


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