Videogame Kudos to Atari, with Love, from Sheep
Okay, videogame fans, you’re probably thoroughly confused by now, but this one simply has to be seen to be believed. Extreme shepherding re-imagined as vibrant performance art.
Game Writer: London Edition
By popular demand, here is a first sampling of some of the images and musings from my Europe trip. I’ll keep them coming- and keep them short and sweet.
So, yeah, I decided to pull the trigger and visit my friend Sue in London and my cousin in Dublin. It’s not the off-peak flight period I’d been eyeing, but sometimes you just have to spill the miles. The weather was good, I’d never been to Europe, it fit my work schedule, we’d been talking about it for awhile already, and my parents lived in London for years. In fact, I visited their old house. If things had gone slightly differently, I would’ve been born there like my older brother.
From Heathrow, I caught the tube with little difficulty. The tube goes overground on that route and I was surprised to see, even in the distant outskirts, nothing but classic British brick houses on little hills, packed in tight on tiny streets. Where are the strip malls? The sloppy slap-dash houses with vinyl siding? Is there no vinyl siding on this entire island? As I was to find during my travels, the answer is apparently “no.” The British believe quite firmly in not living in houses that look like they were extruded from plastic.
That familiar fast-growth landscape that we’re used to in the US? Walmart next to TGIF, Starbucks and McDonald’s on the corner, all in boxy beige buildings? Does not exist anywhere near London or Dorset. This was one of the biggest shocks of my trip. The Brits have chain stores, but they blend into the surrounding architecture and often inhabit buildings that are centuries old. I’ll post some pictures soon.
We headed off to the River Lee canal, about a mile from Sue’s place on the north side of London, where we saw a houseboat traversing a lock and picked up some ice cream (70p, or about US$24). Two little girls were out picking berries by the footpath with their father, and they offered us a few. (Sue tells me that despite the bucolic surroundings, the area has been plagued by thieves who ambush bicyclists, stab them in the leg, and make off with their transport.) We had above-average curry delivery for dinner. I love a country where you can get curry delivered. Sue wasn’t impressed with the quality though.
We also turned on the BBC digital radio for a bit in the kitchen. It happened to be on a classic rock station, and sure enough, the second song played was Mellencamp’s “Small Town,” a song that I was already weary of in the US. I changed the channel.
River Lee houseboats.
River Lee lock.
The back of Sue’s flat. Every house in the country looks like this, by law.
(Would your kitchen look this good if your fridge were broken?) Three observations about this part of the world, which held to be generally true in Ireland as well: 1) The fridges are really tiny by American standards. 2) The clothes washers are in the kitchens. No one has a dedicated laundry room or garage, in general. 3) That white box on the wall in the corner is an on-demand electric water heater, another standard feature. Uses less energy because you’re not paying to keep 60 gallons of water piping hot all day and all night.
Out of town
Game Writer Land posting has slowed to a crawl because of a little vacationing. Here are some sample images. Hope you all are well.
Power of the Human Voice
Saw this on Facebook. (Jamal, I think it was yours.)
I love musical instruments, but we often forget that one of the most effective and adaptable instruments is carried with us everywhere we go. A single voice can haunt or inspire, whether in a video game cutscene or in concert. You just need to know how to harness it.
World Science Festival 2009: Bobby McFerrin Demonstrates the Power of the Pentatonic Scale from World Science Festival on Vimeo.
All Star Game 2009
The NL Didn’t Have to Lose the All Star Game in 2009
The All Star Game 2009 is over, and the NL lost again. Good thing the Astros (the team that unfortunately has my witless loyalty) aren’t going to the WS, because now I don’t have to be angry about losing the 2009 All-Star Game.
Wait, I’m still angry about the 2009 All-Star Game. The American League has owned this contest for too long. The NL played this All-Star Game like a bunch of rookies, especially with all the fielding boo-boos and missed cut-off throws.
The crucial juncture IMHO was Heath Bell against hotshot rookie Adam Jones. At this point the All Star Game is tied in the 8th. Bell has a devastating breaking ball and a high-90s heater. He gives up a triple to Granderson, and then after an intentional walk, he faces the rook.
All Star Game 2009, Now 100% Strategy-Free
Bell throws two filthy breakers – sliders, I think. They look positively Brad Lidge-like. Jones is helpless against them, fouling them off his shoetops. Then Bell goes to the heater. “Good idea,” I think. “This guy is going to show him some heat to set up the breaking-ball strikeout. Classic technique against a rookie who’s never seen an All-Star Game-quality slider.”
Bell throws Jones another heater, and another. Unsurprisingly, the rookie is getting dialed in on that, catching up with each pitch. You don’t make the majors if you can’t hit straight cheese. “Where’s the slider?!?” I think. “And why is that four-seamer so damned straight?” Jones unsurprisingly pounds the crap out of the fourth straight fastball he sees in the AB. Fly ball to right. Granderson scores. Goodbye, All-Star Game 2009.
The Loser of the All Star Game 2009 Speaks Out
Here’s some Bell wisdom from the All-Star Game wrap at Fanhouse.com:
Bell explained that he had no scouting report whatsoever on Granderson.
“That’s the only thing that was worrying me [before the game], how am I going to pitch them?” Bell said. “I was trying to throw it by him, simple as that. I didn’t do my job. I probably should have thrown a breaking ball there. Oh well. I’m driving with my eyes closed.”
[I’m guessing this is actually what he said about Jones, not Granderson, since Jones is the rookie and Granderson’s been around awhile. Apparently this guy is so prepared that he never bothered to talk to any of the coaches or catchers about the guys he was about to face. I mean, it’s just the freakin’ All Star Game. Anyhow, here’s what he did after losing the 2009 All Star Game.]
“I got pissed, threw my glove, kicked a door, like I normally do,” he said. “Then I realized I’ve been pitching really good lately and I kind of needed a wake-up call and this is a good wake-up call, because it doesn’t count on my record. It didn’t ruin it for the Padres, my ultimate team.”
When it was pointed out to Bell that he may have ruined it in the World Series for the Dodgers, who have the majors’ best record, he seemed to get some satisfaction.
“I’ve ruined it for the Dodgers with saves against them,” he said, “so I’m just doing what I normally do.”
Would that be… losing the All-Star Game 2009?
Another ACL TV Show Experience
Back to ACL TV!
When it rains it pours. And in a good way.
Last Tuesday, it was ACL TV show time again. I was fortunate enough (and yes, willing enough to wait in line for 45 minutes in the 100 degree heat) to land tickets to the ACL TV taping for Allen Toussaint. I invited my pal and collaborator Jessica Nelson, who by the way is a very talented Austin logo designer and graphic designer. She was a first-timer, and I got a kick out of her exclamation after the first song: “I feel like I’m in a dream!”
We got an excellent spot in the second or third rank, mosh pit, stage right, just behind a young woman who proved to be the most uninhibited dancer and Toussaint fan in the entire crowd. I’m certain she’ll show up in the broadcast.
Allen Toussaint
Now when people talk about a “music legend,” there’s usually a little bit of reserve implied. The words mean important geezer or he was a wrecking ball in his prime. Bob Dylan is a music legend, but my friends who saw him at the ACL Music Festival are not reluctant to diss the man, claiming his performance was unfocused and unpleasant to the ear.
Allen Toussaint is a music legend, but I mean that only in a complimentary way. I was a little concerned going in that the show was destined to be an oldies, “pat on the back” kind of affair, but such concerns were only the figments of an uninformed mind.
You see, Allen Toussaint is musicality incarnate.
I’m not writing this to detail the contributions of Toussaint, a New Orleans R&B institution and author of hits for artists as diverse as Glen Campbell, the Stones, himself, and yes, Devo. But the guy is totally relevant and a master showman. Genial, sharing the spotlight generously with his talented band, Toussaint gave to the Steinway and the mike at his ACL TV taping like they were his own flesh and blood. I was consistently impressed with the sweetness and tonal perfection of the band’s solos. Probably the only sour note of the evening was when he threw us a wry, remonstrative smile when some lunk kicked a plastic cup during the quiet piano-accompanied storytelling lead-in for “Southern Nights.”
The ACL TV Taping’s Brightest Moments
There are two moments that stand out for me. One was a gift from the audience to him, and the other of course was his gift to us.
During his instrumental rendition of “St. James Infirmary,” some of the audience seized on the beat and began snapping their fingers to it. Spontaneously, everyone joined in, until the soft tune was delicately accented by all our fingers in unison. Toussaint had a smile on his face as he finished the song, and he thanked us for the experience.
The other moment was a brilliant, tour de force piano solo delivered by Toussaint without any help from his band. I dread to call it a medley, because medleys are often maudlin, and this performance was the antithesis of maudlin. It soared from jazz to pop to classical to R&B, blending them all and making a persuasive wordless argument for a universal theory of musical genres. Sometimes he hinted at familiar strains, like a gentle musical nudge; other times the ear could pick out pieces of Gershwin or Paul Simon. More impressive, really, was that the performance conveyed emotions more than musical ideas – wonder, joy, sadness, and at the end, an expansive sense of adventure and possibility that I can only guess to have been a statement about Austin and the spirit of the south. A lesser musician would’ve tried to make that statement with a bit of Willie Nelson or a lick of Texas blues, but no, no, Allen Toussaint is far too skilled and subtle for that.
When we left, we heard one of the ACL TV staff talking to another, grinning broadly. He was saying, “That one was a highlight.”
Thank you, Mr. Toussaint.
Cheetah with Bolt – Now Cheesier
Cheetah with Bolt Makes My Mouth Hurt
My friend Nicol and I were watching TV half-heartedly and we saw one of those Grande commercials go by, advertising some accelerated internet service in Austin called “Cheetah with Bolt.” I’m not sure what Cheetah with Bolt is. Sounds like a new costumed crimefighting team.
Anyhow, Nicol admitted that she thought it was a badly-planned new snack product. Specifically, Cheetos with Jolt. Now that, my friends, would be one hellish cheesy puff.
ACL TV Show Recap
An ACL TV taping is a once-in-a-lifetime experience
You ever been to an ACL TV show taping? If you live in Austin, or visit Austin occasionally, you owe it to yourself to go to an Austin City Limits taping. It’s like a backyard concert with 320 of your closest friends, listening to an amped-up performance from a musical act of national or international stature.
My friends Kevin, Katya, Centerfield Dave, and Mike and I were lucky enough to get into the Okkervil River ACL TV taping last Thursday. Lucky is definitely an operative word; five people after us, the ACL staff cut off the line of hopefuls and sent those people home empty-handed. For your reference, my ACL numbered ticket was #185.
Okkervil River’s performance
I’m not very pleased with my success as a music reviewer; I’ve done it several times and I’m never entirely satisfied with the results. Still, for your sake, dear reader, I’ll try and sum up the experience. This was Okkervil’s first ACL TV taping, but as you’d expect from an act with their pedigree, they were entirely up for the experience and showed no signs of nervousness.
They hit the stage with about ten or 12 musicians, including a string quartet (quintet?) and a few pieces of brass. Frontman Will Sheff, initially sporting a bookish pair of black-framed glasses, had the air of an affable, gawky friend amongst friends, sometimes rattling on about surviving the TV taping, always singing with passion and without visible effort. His aw-shucks demeanor was nowhere to be seen, though, in the times when it was most important, in the crucial peaks of songs and in urging the crowd for energy.
The band showcased both fresh arrangements — most notably a delicate piano-and-vocals intro to Black Sheep Boy‘s dire and delicious “For Real” — and its patented propulsive paens like “Our Life is Not a Movie or Maybe,” which are vibrant on headphones but deliver a visceral, full-howl punch in person, building slowly until every bandmember on stage is seemingly deconstructing their instrument in a frenzy of passion.
I was personally hoping to hear them play the tragically delicate “Savannah Smiles” off Stage Names, but there never seemed to be an appropriate time to yell out suggestions. “The President’s Dead” would’ve been nice too. Was happy to hear the lyrical “Starry Stairs” and its horn-driven lope, though. I’m not sure requests are even allowed at an ACL TV taping; the TV crew probably has to plot out all the camera moves for each song. Often the bulky cameras were gliding around at the front of the stage, inches from colliding with one another.
Was also happy to see Jonathan Meiberg of the sublime band Shearwater make an appearance for “Lost Coastlines.” Sadly they failed to mike his guitar on the first go-round, though, so Sheff announced a do-over which was gamely received.
The ACL taping environment
This was my third ACL TV taping experience (the other bands were Guided by Voices and Ben Kweller). I’m a lucky boy. I remember they miscalculated for GBV and were trying to hand out tickets on the corner of Dean Keaton and Guadalupe to get butts in the seats. Pretty sad for one of the best shows I’ve ever seen (not just at ACL TV).
Anyhow, back to Okkervil. As you’d expect with such a small crowd, instrument changes and personnel rearrangements caused mildly uncomfortable silences, during which we could hear a pronounced equipment hum. The ACL TV crew do this gig on a regular basis so I doubt any of that is going to be audible in the master signal. At any ordinary venue, I expect crowd noise and sheer size would probably overwhelm the hum to the point of inaudibility. On the plus side, I’ve seen Okkervil before at the Carousel Lounge, and I can promise you that I could hear the lyrics a heckuva lot better at the ACL TV taping.
Thumbs down, though, to Budweiser Select, the ACL sponsor who failed to provide enough beer. I didn’t expect or even want seconds, but the keg was floated well before we entered the building.
I give Sheff all the credit in the world for amping the crowd and garnering our support. Okkervil songs are hardly dance numbers, but people were up, involved. clapping, hollering, and even soul clapping when requested. The ACL TV studio is essentially a sterile environment, like a kiddie pool stage surrounded by junior-high-school risers, and it’s easy for a band to die miserably in the silence.
Some ACL TV advice
If you want a slice of some ACL TV deliciousness:
- the “space available” tickets are all the same, no matter when you get your email notification that you’re eligible. There are no elite beggars, as I found out on Thursday. I was on the early list and thought there’d be two lines.
- they pass out numbered tickets early, and then you have to return an hour before the show to see if you actually got in. It’s an evening-eater and frankly a pain in the ass to wait in line twice in one evening for a ticket you may or may not get. Maybe I’ll write up my suggestion for fixing this later.
- no cameras.
- no backpacks.
- wear comfortable shoes because you might be standing all night.
- the chalk line around the camera jib is a suggestion, not a rule, according to producer Terry Lickona. You can stand over the line as long as you don’t mosh your way into that big metal beam.
- turn off your cellphone. :)
Need a Shot to the Kisser?
Try the Pez gun. Great for parents who encourage their kids to engage in suicide- and execution-themed play. Click the gun for the full story at TopCultured.
The Do Not Call List
The Do Not Call List Is Broken
The Do Not Call List is another new feature on our modern communications landscape, and it’s one I’m not particularly fond of. You see, the Do Not Call List does exactly what you don’t want it to do — it makes your phone number readily available to telemarketers.
To put it in game writer terms, telemarketers are playing a game that the U.S. government and FTC are trying to impose rules upon. Unfortunately, that ruleset has only weak enforcement in the country, and zero weight outside it.
The Do Not Call List Wants To…
The Do Not Call List does function in a remedial, 1970s fashion. I’m not talking bell-bottoms, but close. The List tells telemarketers “don’t call any of these numbers!” and that’s effective for the 1970s-style telemarketers. The ones who follow the rules and are afraid of government enforcement.
Modern telemarketers are, unsurprisingly, a lot like vermin. They scurry around, looking for any kind of quick-hit profit so they can survive to live another day. Bash them once, and they’ll pop up in another spot under another guise, and they don’t give a crap about FTC rules because they’re gone before any slow-footed G-man can get a bead on the source of their stench.
The Do Not Call List Sells Your Phone Number
Yep. You’d think it was some piece of bad conspiracy game writing, but no, just go to the Do Not Call List telemarketer service site and look at the menu on the left side. Item #6 is “DOWNLOAD PHONE NUMBERS.” That’s an eye-opener all right — the farmer throwing the henhouse door wide open for the foxes.
It’s actually not that bad, because they require telemarketers to register and pay for the information. And how can they tell telemarketers “don’t call these people!” if the telemarketers don’t know which people not to call?
On the other hand, what’s to stop a telemarketer from using the Do Not Call List as their hotsheet for suckers? Or from selling the list to another firm?
Probable Do Not Call Safeguards
If the FTC has any smarts, they’ve seeded the list with phony names and numbers that they use to monitor abuse just like I mentioned. Unfortunately, for the modern telemarketer, or any overseas operation, I don’t see how they can make anything stick. Have you ever heard of the FTC extraditing telemarketers? I don’t think so.
Getting Off the Do Not Call List
Removing yourself from the list is easy, but you have to look hard to find it. From the FTC website:
7. What if I change my mind? Can I take my number off the National Do Not Call Registry?
You can de-register your phone number from NDNC by calling or sending SMS to toll-free 1909 saying ‘STOP DND‘. It will be removed from the National Do Not Call Registry within next 45 days.
The NDNC number is 1-888-382-1222. This game writer was getting two regular calls every morning, and I finally had myself removed. The calls went away. However, I still get the occasional call, and that’s where I experience the downside.
Why You Might Want to Stay on the List
While you’re on the list, you have a legal foot to stand on. You can hit the Do Not Call List website or the more elaborate and detailed FCC telemarketing complaint page and get the law on your side. No guarantees on what they’ll do, and I’ve certainly never heard a peep from the gov when I’ve reported violators, but it’s theraputic.
Now that I’m off the list, I really can’t do anything about telemarketers except curse them. Or you can do what we used to do at the office, which is waste their time. You said, “Sure, I’m interested in that product! Hold on a minute!” and then put the phone down for about 5. Then pick it up and apologize and see how long you can string ’em along. It’s good fun and hits them where it hurts. Too bad it doesn’t work on machines.
Lastly, here’s a little tidbit for your amusement. It’s a document describing the Do Not Call List — for India. That’s right. Americans aren’t the only ones being telemarketed to, so you can relax and stop feeling so special.